An old lady owned two monkeys. One day they both died, so she took them to the taxodermist. “So you want them mounted?” asked the taxidermist. To which she replied: “No. Holding hands will do just fine.”

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How do you catch an elephant? First you dig a big hole, and fill it with wood and ash. Then you take a loadof peas and line them up around the hole. Then, when the elephant goes to take a pea, kick him in the ash-hole!

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What’s the biggest drawback in the jungle?
The Elephants foreskin.

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A double whammy:
Why do elephants paint thier testicles red?
So they can hide in cherry trees.
What’s the loudest noise in the jungle?
A Monkey eating cherries.

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In the dead of summer a fly was resting on a leaf beside a lake. He was a hot, dry fly who said to no one in particular, “Gosh! If I go down three inches I will feel the mist from the water and I will be refreshed.” There was a fish in the […]

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